I Got A New Camera With A Zooooom Lens

Word Of The Day

{the first in my new series featuring words we use in our family that make us different (weird) from other families}

food•dance - definition: shuffling of the feet, snapping of the fingers, sometimes a wiggling of the booty, due to the excitement of finally getting to feed one's hungry belly; the dance is usually performed while one's food is being prepared or heating in the microwave; in extreme cases of hunger the dance continues as one eats one's food; the most animated food dance usually occurs after a three hour church service and is sometimes accompanied with humming or singing;
not to be confused with the potty dance, which is similar to the food dance but is accompanied with a panic stricken face

Punnish and Stucko

Jackson has more than one reason to hate the word 'punish' now. It was that word that knocked him out of the Spelling Bee yesterday. It was in the same round as words like 'barrel' and 'fossil' that even had me wondering if it's two S's and one L or one S and two L's.

Of course I was nervous anyway, watching from the audience in a cold sweat, having been there myself in 4th grade. I was the runner-up but I still swear to this day that I won the whole dang thing. I know I spelled my final word 'junior' right. (I just spell-checked it...☺) I'm convinced it was fixed. I'm over it though....really....

Anyway, back to yesterday. Sadie was eliminated with the word 'stucco'. The "Whatch you talkin' bout Willis?" look on her face when the reader gave her the word was priceless. She was obviously not familiar with the word, but gave it her best shot.
I'd say we were representin' with 2 kids out of 18 in the whole school that were eligible for the spelling bee and I'm pretty darn proud of them.

I should clarify one thing about my post 2 days ago about our new president. Since I basically disagree with him on every moral issue and I'm going to be less than thrilled when my taxes start going up, I probably shouldn't have said I support him because it sounded like I back him on all the issues. What I meant was that even though I don't entirely agree with him on everything and didn't vote for him, I still respect him as the president of our country.

Basically, you can't call me a Dixie Chick.

It'll Be A Cold Day In....

....Florida before another Democrat gets sworn in as President. It's approaching 28° tonight so I guess it had to happen. Ha Ha. ☺
Even though I didn't vote for him, I'm going to support him as my duty as an American, and hope he keeps some of his many, many promises.

I'm a little more worried right now that Jackson and Sadie are going head to head in the school's 4th and 5th grade Spelling Bee tomorrow.
It could be Jackson's worst nightmare.

Technology

After 60 years of being deaf in his left ear, my dad can hear again. He had surgery a few months ago to prepare his ear for an attachment he received just this morning. This was his response to my e-mail asking him if he can hear me yet.

"I got it this morning, and I can hear you loud and clear. I hear every little thing: keys rattling, coins clinking in my pocket, and I can hear it clearly when I rub my fingers over the fabric in my shirt sleeve.
It will take some getting used to, because I still can't tell the direction that sound is coming from, but that will improve with time.
I've been listening to Kathleen Battle, Anne Murray and Roberta Flack all afternoon, and I can understand every word."

Guess I'm gonna have to watch my mouth from now on....

Home Alone

5 years ago:
Steve was out of town or on a scout campout or something to where he was not sleeping at home that night. I hadn't stayed home alone with the kids in quite awhile, and never had in this house we recently moved into. I did my window and door check, set the security alarm, then went to check on each of the kids. I checked the girls, made sure they were breathing (you know you do it too). They were breathing so I went in Jackson's room to check on him. As I went into the room and was adjusting his blanket, I hear a weird, muffled, slow-motion, serial killer, 'I Know What You Did Last Summer' voice say, "Hello. May I help you?"

You can imagine how my heart stopped for about 10 seconds while a sheer cold panic spread from head to toe. I turned around and did the thing all the stupid people in those horror movies do. I went looking for The Voice.

As I was tip-toeing around, I heard it again, only more of a distorted Max Headroom voice this time.
"He-he-hello. May I he-help you-oo?"

I found The Voice in Jackson's toybox in the closet. It turned out to be a toy cell phone that one of the kids had thrown into the tub earlier so it was shorting out. I buried it under some clothes in the dresser and went to bed with a butcher knife under my pillow.

3 Years Ago:
I was home alone with the kids again for the same reason, a campout or something. I was doing the same routine, check doors and windows, set alarm, check kids, when all of a sudden I hear our computer start dialing up (pre DSL) to connect to the internet.

Sheer, cold panic again and instead of grabbing all the kids and getting out I did the stupid girl in the horror movie thing again and went looking to see what the deal was. I discovered our computer all connected to the internet.

I called my sister and had her on the phone while I did an entire house check (under beds, in closets, under the fridge, and in cabinets that even a small child couldn't fit into).

After the all clear, I unplugged the computer and went to bed with a butcher knife, flashlight, home phone, cell phone (both programmed to dial my neighbor with the touch of a button) and car keyless entry remote with the panic button side up under my pillow.

(Figured out later that the internet had already been connected and was in some kind of mode to re-dial and connect automatically if you got booted off.)

Last Night:
I was up reading late in the family room after everyone had gone to bed. When I finally went to bed, I turned off the light and went out of the room. As I was walking out I hear the hum of a toy motorcycle engine.

Not as much panic as the serial killer incident, but I stopped breathing for a second. I recognized the sound from a puzzle Justin got for Christmas that makes noises when you put the puzzle piece in the right spot. But just Who put the piece in the puzzle to make the motorcycle sound?

Of course I went to check and it turns out the puzzle is light-powered (I thought they were magnetized) so when I turned off the lights, the motorcycle revved up. I was a little on edge already because a few nights ago a police helicopter had been sweeping our neighborhood with a spotlight at 1 am for awhile, looking for someone on the run.

Anyway, no more butcher knives for me. I went to bed last night and slept soundly with my husband right next to me and a 9mm very nearby. Boy how times have changed.

Christmas Rap Up

T'was a week after Christmas and all through our hood
Not a creature is starving since we had so much food.

There was ham and potatoes and green beans galore
And jello and rolls, pies and ice-cream and more!

We ate and we ate til we thought we'd explode
To work it all off, to the beach we rode.

In the 80 degrees we played some football
Til Grandpa showed off and took a huge fall.

Shopping and eating and eating some more
Driving and fishing right off of the shore.

We found a new way to make pumpkin pie
And may we suggest you give it a try!

We played board games with cheaters, who will remain nameless
And our drive to St. Augustine was really quite painless.

Back to the beach we went for a fire
Where we played some more til it was time to retire.

The kids had some fun outside on the tramp
Then they set up forts like a refugee camp.

Their new toys brought them such happiness daily
Skateboards, a harp and a ukulele.

Video games, guns and too much candy
A tool set for mom she will find quite handy.

A GPS under the tree for Dad
He's taking it back - that makes Mom mad.

We'll miss you Grandma, Grandpa, Laura and Jake
We had a blast this Christmas break!

But the party's not over, don't you fear
Off again to ring in the the Mexican New Year!

All of the details are really quite hazy
Too much punch makes a party crazy.

Chimichangas and salsa and chicken taquitos
Guacamole and nachos and spicy burritos.

Grandaddy ate his 73rd birthday cake
Then remodeled a bathroom, for pete's sake!

To Target to make our yearly appearance
For the 75% off after Christmas clearance.

Now it's time to get real, as sad as that sounds
Time to work off all those holiday pounds.

Time to go back to school and homework and chores
To work and laundry and mopping the floors.

We had so much fun, make no mistake
We'll be back for more for Spring Break!